For the past few months I have been suffering with chronic low back pain. Not super high on the pain scale, but always there. Reminding me. Nagging at me.
It has been making me feel more cranky, unhappy and less like my usual positive self. As a physical therapist I have been doing everything I can think of to fix it….
But nothing seemed to work.
It was suggested that I see a sports doctor for another opinion, so I made an appointment but after sitting with it for a few days decided to cancel my appointment. There was something nagging at me, something telling me this wasn’t the answer.
Trusting my intuition I decided to go and see a friend of mine who is a Kinesiologist and Energy worker. Within the first 10-minutes of the session I literally broke down in tears and sobbed. Big, loud, shoulder-heaving sobs that I couldn’t control.
I don’t usually cry in front of people. I’ve always been the happy, positive, got-my-shit-together, strong-headed woman…not this vulnerable emotional mess.
But if felt good. So damn good! She had me stand in my heart space and re-connect to myself and to my purpose, something that had not seemed a little out of focus lately. I was reminded of my strengths and how I am here to serve. Where did I feel unsupported? How can I be more open to receiving? It was a powerful experience and after that session, my back was (not surprisingly) pain-free.
Authenticity is one of my core values, and it is the foundation on which I will build my life and my business.
Yet with starting this new online business, wide open to critique and criticism, I’ve been so caught up in being, doing and writing what I think other people want, and trying to find a way to please everyone, that it has been really weighing me down, more than I realised (back pain).
So I’m writing this blog post tonight to get this off my chest, to share my experiences, to write what I’m really thinking and feeling, to be more vulnerable, and to help you get to know me better.
If you are a chronic pain sufferer, then I hope this post inspires you to look beyond conventional treatment. Sometimes the truth lies much deeper, and physical pain in the body can be healed by addressing the emotional. It has happened to me too many times now to not believe.
Today I am making an oath to myself, and to you my reader, that I will live from a place of pure authentic self-expression. I will choose to be comfortable in the perfect imperfections of my business and life, and trust the evolution. I hope this will inspire you to do the same.
From the heart space,